Pretty Fly For A Black Guy

Obama The media were literally (LITERALLY!!) spurting jizz all over each other with fawning adoration at the fact that Obama managed to kill a fly. That's right, he summarily executes a living being and George Alagiah hurriedly beats one out before handing over to Dan for the weather.

What next Barack? A puppy? A baby? It's a slippery slope.

There was an old woman who swallowed a fly – Obama has clearly learnt nothing whatsoever about policy from her tale of woe. His murder of this fly will have consequences that Obama has not put enough thought into... let us enlighten you...

If it hadn't been viciously murdered, that fly was going to eat off some of the cakes in the Whitehouse kitchen.
The cakes were then to be eaten by Joe Biden, all of them, 200 cakes in total.
Joe Biden would then have been sick, not because of all the cake, but because just before the cake buffet, the fly would have been all over the Obama's dog's poo-poos. Consequently, Joe Biden does not now get sick.
Joe is interviewed by CNN in relation to swine flu. Given that he is not sick, he gives a "Biden Interview".
He lets slip that things could potentially get apocalyptic, "even worse than Scranton".
In response to this Rush Limbaugh explodes with rage, and while this is initially greeted by most, it soon emerges that the goo contained within him spread evenly across all 48 states (there's only one Carolina and one Dakota Fanning) and has spawned hundreds of Ann Coulters.
An army of Ann Coulters marches up Pennsylvania Avenue with shotguns and pitchforks towards Obama. The ones with pitchforks quickly realise they should have brought shotguns too.
As they reach the gates of the Whitehouse the ACA (Ann Coulter Army) get distracted by a group of 9/11 widows, and turn their wrath on them. Obama continues to play basketball at the front of the Whitehouse, oblivious to the carnage a few yards away.
The ACA react violently to the fact that Obama is ignoring the plight of the brave 9/11 widows, however given that the plight of the widows is also being caused by the ACA, the hundreds of Ann Coulters explode in a goo-blast of self fuelled illogical rage.
Meanwhile, a swarm of flies, family and friends of the one that Obama killed, gather to the rear of the Whitehouse to plan their attack on him.
It turns out that feasting on the Ann Coulter goo enables the flies to gain almost supernatural powers.
As they grow in power they form a Committee of Revenge, which targets not Obama, but the Actor Eric Stoltz for The Fly 2, stating in their Youtube Video that he, "Insulted all flies and the memory of the award-winning Jeff Goldblum film The Fly, by being a ginger tosser".
Eric Stoltz twitters a response stating, "da flys can suck on my big hairy ginger ballsack and so can jeff goldbum".
Twitter’s owners are also presidents of the Jeff Goldblum Appreciation Society and immediately shut down the whole site. Nobody notices Iran imploding.
Nuclear technology and materials now leak over the borders into Iraq and Afghanistan, with no tweets to alert the world.
Al Qaeda begins drinking nuclear materials with the intention of renaming themselves The Incredible al Qaeda with the tag line "You wouldn’t like us when we're al Qaeda". This doesn’t happen and they all die of radiation poisoning.
In the political and military vacuum that ensues, women in the region rise up, throwing off their clothes and baring skin all over the place.
Bill Clinton decides to accompany Hillary on her official visits to the region.
Shortly after arrival, Bill Clinton's testicles explode with excitement, this results in a "Slick Willie" cum-slick far worse than the Ann Coulter or Rush Limbaugh goo incidents.
Congress impeaches President Obama for causing the world to be covered in Bill Clinton’s cum. Obama is removed from office covered in shame, disgrace and Bill Clinton’s cum.

Shouldn't have killed that fly, Barack.
not-so-fly-for-a-black-guy@randomshite.co.uk